I thought I would share some tips with you I have received from our negotiation specialist.

1. Using silence

Saying nothing can sometimes be as powerful as speaking, providing silence is used at the right time and in the right way.

2. Summarising frequently

By definition, negotiations can often be complex, so never be afraid to summarise.

3. Making notes

This too helps keep negotiations on track.

4. Leaving people feeling good at each step

Negotiation typically builds agreement progressively. Make sure you emphasise that each stage is good – preferably for both parties.

5. Reading between the lines

Remember that negotiation is essentially an adversarial process. Watch out particularly for danger phrases that often mean something other than they seem to, even the very opposite.

• “You’re a reasonable fellow.”  Meaning: “I am”.
• “That’s much fairer for both of us.” Meaning: “Especially for me”.

6. Remaining neutral

Maintain neutrality as much and as long as possible. Negotiation works best as a balancing exercise.

7. Concentrating – all the time

Concentrate. Build in time to think if necessary. Use delaying tactics to stop you getting into difficulty.

8. Keeping your powder dry

Beware of acting precipitately. Try not to make an offer, certainly not a final offer, until everything that needs negotiating is on the table.

9. Beware deadlines

It is said that there has not been a deadline in history that was not negotiable. Timing is a variable.

10. Remembering constraints and variables are interchangeable

Almost anything the other side presents as fixed may be made into a variable. The word fixed is as likely to mean we do not want to negotiate this, as it cannot be used as a variable.

As I write this blog I feel slightly embarrassed that after nearly fifteen years of running my own business, today was the first time that I attended a networking event.  I have been to conferences and seminars but not an out and out networking event.  I have to say that I have always been a bit dismissive of the idea of going to such an event.  My impression of a networking event was of lots of people all selling their products and services at each other.  I now realise that networking events could be like that but also could offer a lot more to those who attend.

The event I attended was hosted by the Southwark Chamber of Commerce.  When we arrived we were greeted positively and encouraged to grab a cup of tea or coffee and “mingle”.  At this point I thought “here we go” small talk time and was quite pleased to discover that there didn’t appear to be anymore tea available so I quickly made myself busy seeking out some more.  However, once the tea had arrived and my fellow tea drinkers and I started to introduce ourselves and chat, I realised that it is the small talk that gets it all going.  Lots of people find small talk a little awkward, talking to those that you don’t know can often be difficult.  The networking event environment actually helps you here.  The fact that you don’t know anybody means that you have to dive in.  There appeared to be a collective sense of “well we’re here so we might as well talk”.  I suppose that is obvious and seasoned networkers would understand this.  After a short period we were invited into a dining room where breakfast was to be served.  A sit down breakfast, again not what I was expecting, I thought a bit of mingling, few cups of tea, breakfast with those who you came with and go!

As my colleague, James and I entered the dining room, I decided that there was no point sitting next to him, so I headed to the other end of the table and found myself sitting at the head of the table, a chair others had avoided I think.  First good decision:  don’t sit next to your colleague, it is comfortable but limits your networking options.  I found myself next to a guy called Tony and a lady called Chica without going into detail, they worked for very different organisations.  I soon got into the swing of introducing myself to others around my end of the table but the Chair of the Chamber of Commerce also asked everyone to formally introduce themselves in turn to everyone round the table.  People took their chance to make a good impression and it gave everyone a chance to identify who they might want to have a chat with at some point.  The Chair of the Chamber welcomed us all and reminded us of what the Chamber was all about and it made me start to think about other benefits of this type of event.

The dining room created a very open environment that encouraged conversation and the attendees were taking their chance.  Chica and I did have a chat about training and our roles in the organisations we worked in but actually the bulk of our conversation was about the changing face of South London.  Tony gave me some ideas about how we might go about printing up some training documents and manuals, which was food for thought at the very least.  OK, I didn’t make the deal of the century, James seems to have made more progress in that department.

I did leave with the feeling that I would certainly attend such an event again and felt that somewhere along the line these conversations and contacts will lead to something.  That something may be some training being sold but it also might mean when I do need some printing, some financial advice, a new business property or a self portrait for my office, I might know just the person to contact.  So I now view these events as not just about promoting what we do, they are also about finding out what others do and how they do it.  Overall, I think the message is “don’t underestimate the networking event”.  Make the most of them not only as way of promoting your business but as a way of creating a support network to draw upon.

Foot note:  one day after this event somebody booked onto one of our Introduction to Sales courses as a direct result of a conversation had at the event.  So I am now even keener on networking events!

Written by Bill Osmond – MD